


I'll be good

by Sylvalum



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Self-Hatred, Talking, i'm sorry tek, philosophical nonsense, so much talking oh god
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 10:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15629241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sylvalum/pseuds/Sylvalum
Summary: “It’s Infinite-““Finn,” Gadget says, in a gentle voice but with such force that Sonic goes still, the scream in his head going quiet. “His name’s Finn, and he needs help.”





	I'll be good

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tekina_fiction](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tekina_fiction/gifts).



> Happy birthday to the amazing and talented Tekina-fiction!!! this fic is about as close to angst as I can write – anyway. Tek? HAPPY BDAY! (´ω｀)

The food’s almost done when the doorbell starts ringing. “I’ll take it,” Sonic says before anyone else can, dropping the forks on the table and dashing to the front door. He’s just about to open when he remembers that he isn’t expecting anyone, and then his mind cycles through _surprise-visit_ , _friend-needs-a-place-to-stay-maybe, could-be-the-mailman-?_  and _they-have-found-me._ When he opens the door it appears to be option #1, though he can’t fathom why.

“Hey buddy,” Sonic greets. “What can I do for you?”

Gadget looks, of all things, anxious. Or no, scratch that – he looks guilty, very worried, and a bit sheepish. “I need a favour.”

“Okay…?” Sonic says slowly, trying to get a read on the situation. “And that is-?”

Gadget just stares at Sonic for a moment, until it seems as if he’s decided on something. _Trust me_ , Sonic thinks. Gadget makes a gesture for him to wait, and then he steps back outside, disappearing from view. Sonic feels the curiosity almost like a physical pull, but Gadget told him to wait, so he stays put.

There’s a sound like Gadget is trying to maneuver a sack full of sand around, like he’s murmuring something to reassure a small animal, and then he steps back inside the house again only the fact that _no, what_ -

He’s got _someone with him and it’s-_

Sonic’s stomach plummets like a stone. He drops into a fighting stance and barely hears, like it’s echoing from far away, “NO! Sonic, don’t, he’s friendly he’s harmless _please_ -“

“It’s _Infinite_ -“

“Finn,” Gadget says, in a gentle voice but with such force that Sonic goes still, the scream in his head going quiet. “His name’s Finn, and he needs help.”

Sonic’s fists stay clenched. He exhales. Looks at Infi- _Finn_ , looks him over, and it’s – he looks smaller. He’s leaning on Gadget, he’s got bandages around one of his legs – his chest has bandages too, huh. His hair, matted with dirt and blood, is hanging in his face, shadowing his features. A large white scar cuts across his face, right next to his eye. And he’s looking up, looking right at Sonic with mismatched eyes almost glowing in his tired face.

_He hurt me, and I hurt him-_

“Sonic?” calls Tails from inside the house, and dinner must be ready now and-

“ _Please_ ,” Gadget says, pleading the case for a murderer.

-and Sonic drops his defensive stance, his plans for today, everything. There’s a person who needs help here, and Sonic can help – to not help would be against everything Sonic _is_ even though Infinite _destroyed_ the world, _he’s-_ This is kinda crazy, yeah.

“Alright.”

 

* * *

 

“ _No_.” Shadow glares. “No, he cannot stay here – _Sonic_. I don’t care that it’s your house, he is not staying anywhere near you, _no_.”

“Shadow-“

“ _No_ ,” Shadow snaps. “We thought you were _dead_ for _six months_. I am not leaving you and Tails alone with Infi-“

“Hey,” Sonic interrupts, starting to grin. “I’ve got an idea. What if you stay with us too?”

 

* * *

 

The young fox with two tails is unwrapping the bandages Gadget so clumsily, so carefully, had applied. Finn doesn’t move, barely feeling the pain at this point, and stares up at the ceiling. Gadget is hovering next to him, alternating between standing by the sofa and pacing the room, like Finn is someone to fret over. _How_. How can anyone look at him and decide to _care_? What was wrong with that wolf?

Maybe he’s worried for the fox. Finn doesn’t have the strength to even claw at him, but Gadget-

Gadget knows this.

It’s disgusting. It’s _weak_ of him, Finn is so weak and pathetic and _Chaos_ , why would Gadget bother? This is more than just bothering, this is making a fucking _effort_. This is more than just sympathy, this is… kindness. No. It cannot be. It hurts to think about so Finn clenches his eyes shut, forcing himself to lie still.

“Oh,” the fox says, hands freezing. “I forgot but – do you want painkillers?”

 _No_. Finn opens his mouth and Gadget says, “Yes. Uh, I mean, are you allergic? Finn?”

He exhales, the sound just barely above a growl. “No. I’ll take them.” He opens his eyes to glare at Gadget, but Gadget, the utter moron, just smiles at him. It should be condescending but _no_ , instead it’s so _soft_. Finn wants to break into pieces and hunt down the part in him that hurts so much because of that smile – but he deserves it, doesn’t he. His eyes sting and he closes them, tries to ignore everything but the sound of the fox’s footsteps as he leaves.

-Then there’s suddenly a hand on his shoulder, and unbidden Finn recalls.

Crouching by a campfire in the dark, in the sand and the dry cold air, an arm around his shoulders. Shadows jumping, embers and smoke. Slumped over each other, pulled close together. Their hoarse laughter next to Finn’s ear and _fuck_ , why does he only remember the good things when it’s already too late?

 

* * *

 

It’s late at night. They’re curled around each other in Sonic’s bed (as if he’s still not completely giddy about the whole bed-sharing thing) the covers thrown to the side ‘cause it’s a hot summer, and Sonic feels a bit like his consciousness is gently floating away – and then Shadow abruptly yanks him back to wakefulness. “About Finn,” he begins, and Sonic thinks _oh no,_ because with that tone of voice he’s just _beginning_ to talk- “How… are you _not_ affected by the fact, that _Infinite_ is currently sleeping on your sofa?”

“Uh,” Sonic mumbles, pressing his face into his pillow “’Cause… it’s really late? An’ he’s not Infinite anymore?”

“He tried to kill you.”

“So did you,” mutters Sonic into his pillow.

Silence falls heavily.

_Ah, damn._

Sonic sighs and rolls over. “Shadow, hey?” He pokes at Shadow’s chest until he looks up at him. “I don’t care. About people trying to kill me. It’s like – everyone does it.” Sonic pauses, because _wow_ , that sounded very sane and healthy. Shadow just looks at him quietly, breathing, and Sonic listens to that for a moment. Right. “Infinite – it’s ‘bout what he did to the _world_ , but that… was mostly Eggman’s fault, I think.”

Shadow’s eyes glimmer oddly in the dark. “So you forgive him?” he asks, almost like a challenge, and Sonic’s kinda tired but-

“Yeah? I’m willing to give him a chance, at least.”

No reply comes, and after a minute Sonic forgets what he’s waiting for. A minute later and he’s asleep.

 

* * *

 

They all have breakfast out on the terrace. The day is rapidly becoming hotter, insects already buzzing by the bushes, and Sonic is the only making an effort to actually _eat_. Tails and Gadget are both just picking at their food, Shadow is only having coffee, and everyone keeps glancing at Finn with varying levels of subtlety. Finn just scowls, eyes downcast, and fumbles with his fork.

Gadget wants him to try the syrup. Finn tries the syrup.

Shadow keeps looking at Sonic over the rim of his mug, taking delicate sips of coffee, eyebrow raised. Sonic refuses to acknowledge his very pointed behaviour, and focuses on his pancakes like they hold all the secrets of the universe. The mood isn’t very fun or party maybe, but at least it’s peaceful. Finn needs peace. They _all_ need peace; it’s been a tough year.

-Sometimes Sonic wakes up (without his heart racing, without clawing at the sheets) and he gets up, and stares out through the window at the smudge of clouds, the soft yellow sunlight and swaying treetops. The blue of the sea, if he looks in the right direction. He stays there and stares at it for as long as it takes to convince himself that it’s really over, it’s ended.

 

* * *

 

He lurches awake to the sound of an explosion.

He can almost taste the smoke, panic surging up like blood in his throat – and then another _boom_ washes over the room, heralded by a flash of white light. The realisation sinks him into him slowly. It’s a thunderstorm. Rain beats against the windows, and when he listens closely there’s an ever-present rumble accompanying the wail of the wind.

There’s another crash of thunder.

-then, the sound of something shattering in the kitchen.

Finn’s eyes narrow rapidly, and he glares into the dark. Gadget peers back, his hair a mess and eyes wide, shards of a broken mug in his hands. “Finn?” he asks quietly, like _how can I help you today?_ Finn hates that: the sympathy, the detached compassion, the – the utter lack of anger, of _passion_. Gadget is made entirely of wet clay and small smiles and how, _how_ could he ever defeat Infinite?

…but he did. Couldn’t, wouldn’t, kill him after all.

“I can’t remember,” Finn confesses. “Fighting you.” (He knows he did. There’s footage, both security cameras and some really shaky filming done by a resistance guy.)

“You – really?” Gadget sounds surprised. “Then what do you remember?”

“Red,” Finn answers immediately. “Only red.”

Gadget looks at him strangely. Finn could be lying. He could also be quiet now, instead of talking to the stranger he almost fucking slaughtered months ago.

“Huh,” Gadget says, and leaves.

 

* * *

 

It’s been a whole week of this weird cohabitation when Sonic finds Finn in the kitchen at dawn, raiding the fridge. He startles and stares at Sonic, and then he slams the door to the fridge closed and promptly leaves, limping away. Sonic swallows down the greeting still on the tip of his tongue, and wrenches open the fridge. There’s leftovers, there’s butter and vegetables, there’s milkshakes…

-Finn went out on the terrace. Sonic makes a bit of extra noise when he comes, so that Finn will know he’s there, but the jackal stays put, perched on the edge of the terrace. Sonic flops down next to him and hands him a milkshake. Of course Finn doesn’t take it.

The air’s chilly. Behind the copse of trees surrounding their house the sky’s lilac and milky blue, and Sonic thinks he can even spot a few stars. Critters screech in the bushes, and a mist blurs the shapes of the tree trunks, puts dew in the grass. It’s so fresh and green and lush, just like when he came home again for the first time. A miracle had spared their house, or so it had felt.

“So,” Sonic says, because it’s been three minutes already and nothing has happened. “We haven’t really talked.”

“We shouldn’t.” Finn’s voice is harsh. “You should stay away from me.”

“Uh-huh,” Sonic replies. “ _Why_?”

Finn turns around and just glares at him. “Why? We’re _enemies_! I nearly killed you, I-“

“Yeah,” Sonic interjects quickly. “But do you regret it? You do, don’t you?”

“I _wanted_ to see the world burn! I joined Eggman _willingly_! It doesn’t matter if I regret it-“

Sonic reassures immediately, “Of course it does! As long as you try to be-“

“I _CHOSE_ THIS!” Finn snarls, and for just a part of a second it’s like looking at him on the battlefield, flames reflected in his eyes, and Sonic freezes. “I _chose_ this, the wrong side, all of it. You don’t know what I’ve done, you don’t-“

Sonic helplessly tries to reach out, but Finn turns away.

“I’ve fucked up, my fault. _You_ don’t get to preach about redemption, you’re-“ Finn swallows. “You don’t know.”

There’s a click as the door opens, and they both startle. The night feels unnaturally silent around them now, critters gone dead quiet in the grass, and Sonic feels almost embarrassed as Shadow steps out on the terrace, one eyebrow already quirked. “Sonic?” he asks, calmly. “Is there a problem?”

“It’s nothing,” Sonic says at the exact moment as Finn spits out, “Just _leave_.”

Shadow glances at Sonic. Okay, okay. He lets out a sigh and stands up, taking his milkshake with him as he goes for the door. Shadow’s still leaning against the doorway, watching him, and he starts to smile as Sonic leans in. It’s more of a brush of lips than any real action, but Sonic still grins as he leaves, waving to Shadow.

 

* * *

 

Shadow takes a sip of the milkshake he freed from Sonic’s hands, and regards the back of Finn’s head. His hair is braided sloppily (by himself no doubt) and he’s leaning forward, back rigid, head bowed down. His tail is curled around him, and in the shadows and the pale morning light, his fur looks almost blue, his form almost vulnerable.

Maybe, if Shadow hadn’t fought Jackal Squad that day, then maybe-

(-it would’ve happened no matter what, it would’ve just been someone _else_ -)

-but he had mocked him when he was already kneeling, and that wasn’t… see, Shadow needed to try harder. He’ll never be as bright and forgiving as Sonic, but _Chaos_ : he should at least try to talk to Finn. Maria would already be judging him if she were here…

“I’m sorry.” Shadow says, and sits down where Sonic had sat. “I realise my words are worth nothing, but nevertheless: I’m sorry.”

“No,” Finn says. “You’re not.”

“I’m sorry about your team.”

Finn almost hisses. “ _Don’t_. They’re all _alive_ while Gadget’s friends are _dead_.”

“Would you kill them _now_? Would you kill an innocent now, if you had the chance?” Finn’s glare is sharp, but Shadow looks at him calm as ever. “Did you kill them because you wanted to?”

“…I can’t remember.”

Now _that’s_ intriguing. “Which part?”

“Any part.”

“Really,” Shadow says, glancing at Finn. The jackal doesn’t seem to be lying, which is something so surprising it take him a moment to contemplate it all. Memory issues. Always memory issues.

“What do you want to do next?”

“What?” Finn glares again.

“What will you do next?”

“I thought I’d be _dead_ by now, so,” Finn snaps, “I don’t know.”

“Come with me?” Shadow doesn’t know why he suggests it, but it feels right. “I’ve got a team. You’d fit right in.”

“I doubt it,” Finn scorns, but his warily interested expression betrays him.

“Thieves and spies and a robot hell-bent on revenge? Yes you would.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“…and what do you call yourselves?”

Shadow says, very seriously: “Team Dark.”

“No. No, no – you’re joking.” Shadow just smirks and Finn’s expression goes through horror and disbelief and finally he _grins_ , with sharp teeth and scarred face and all. “You asshole. No-“

“You’re joining Finn, face it.”

 

* * *

 

Inside the house, Sonic points out through the window, and with a jolt of alarm Gadget sees Finn and Shadow sitting together – but then he stops. They’re laughing, both of them, and Gadget feels like he’s found what he was looking for at last, because Finn is smiling and he looks alive.

**Author's Note:**

> Next year I’m just gonna ask what you want ok  
> (…and happy birthday, pal)


End file.
